making it all work

yup

2010-03-17T12:56:00.000-07:00

So hey there folks. All a bijillion of you out there who read my blog... Not to much going on here-I've been working out pretty regularly. I alternate between 30-40 minutes on the elliptical with 45 minutes of cardio workouts. In addition, I have added some very healthy habits in to my schedule. I am on the green smoothie band wagon, and I suggest every one hop on as well! All you do is blend spinach or other greens with water and fruit in your blender, and drink it up. Yummmmy! you don't even taste the veggies, but boy do you get all of your fruits and veggie servings each day. I'm working towards an at least 65-75 percent raw diet-it really seems to be best for my system. Fruits and veggies really heal my intestines from all the celiac disease issues I've had for the past 15 years or so. So yeah, I feel better than I have in a long time, I think because whether I lose all the weight I want or not, I know that I'm starting to adapt the best and most healthy lifestyle for me. Hooray. So that's it. I've been doing 2 green smoothies a day for 2 weeks, have lost 2 pounds, have noticed a huge decrease in my sugar cravings, am sleeping much better, my skin is much clearer, I have more energy, and it's all just from getting my fruits and veggies-not even anything special, just regular stuff you get at the store.

sorry for the hold up

2010-03-04T06:23:00.000-08:00

Sheesh, Mom! No I am not slacking, thank you very much! In fact, just yesterday I had a friend come over and we worked out together! Though it was a challenge with two 21 month old children running around-but we got the workout done. So there! I've also discovered exercisetv.tv online-you can choose workouts to do every day. So I've been switching it up between Jillian and exercisetv.tv every other day. It's been fun. Sorry I haven't posted lately-I had a huge paper due last week, and the week before I had to teach a lesson in class, which went well ( I aced both thank you very much!). See, I have a life outside of this working out thing, so sometimes I've got to put one on the burner while I take care of another. The blog, not the working out. Don't worry. I'm back. Since I'm down to just one class the rest of the semester (and the tutoring and the writing workshop I teach) I'll have more consistent updates here.

just to catch up

2010-01-28T07:43:00.000-08:00

Sorry folks that I haven't been posting lately. It's been a crazy last two weeks, with not much sticking to working out, starting with my trip to Heather's house. So yes, I do blame her. But, the good news, the happy news, the wonderful news is that I have lost 6 pounds in the month of January!!! So go freaking me!!!! You have no idea how happy that makes me. That's 2 pounds less that I hoped for, but 6 pounds more than had I not done anything, right? So onward and upward, my friends. Onward and .... upward.

a new week

2010-01-11T06:43:00.000-08:00

So school starts today-I'm pretty excited! I've had an entire month off, which has been nice, but I'm ready to get back to work-it gets pretty boring around here when I've got nothing to do other than entertain Layla and try to keep the house clean. This also starts the fourth week of working out for me, which means I'm going to kick it up a notch again. I'm kicking it up to two work outs a day starting today. Ideally, I'd be working out in the morning before Layla gets up, but really, let's face it, I don't get out of bed til she does. So that means that I'm going to work out during her nap time, and then again in the evening. I'm going to do the 30 day shred during her nap, since it's just a quick 20 minute workout, and in the evenings I'm going to continue with the boost metabolism blast fat work out. I'll do this for 3 weeks, and then increase the day time workout to my third dvd, no more trouble spots. I'm excited. I'm also going to post pictures from last month and today later this afternoon, so we can see if anything has changed at all. I hope it has. Okay, well, I'll let you know how the two a days are going in a few days.

yessss

2010-01-09T10:36:00.000-08:00

So I've been doing Jillian's Blast Fat and Boost your metabolism work out for a week-it's 50 minutes of death. Up until yesterday, I wasn't able to even finish it. It's 7 circuits of 61/2 minutes each, and if makes me want to die. Yesterday I pushed through and finished the whole thing. And at the end, Jillian said something very profound, at least to me. She said that working out for her isn't just about the ripped body and healthy lifestyle, it's also about knowing what's inside, knowing what she's capable of. It's so easy to say 'oh, this is just too hard, I can't do it' and quit. I don't think I've ever said that about anything intellectual-other than science, of course. I love pushing my brain to its limits. I guess working out does the same thing; it's not just about what I'm physically capable of, it's about what I'm mentally able to push myself to do. And it feels good to know I can push a little farther than I thought I could each time. And, my thighs are starting to look really freaking good!

sorry for the delay

2010-01-04T06:28:00.000-08:00

Just so you all know, I have been working out-I kept it up over the holidays-just didn't keep up the blogging about it. I have switched from the 30 day shred to her burn fat and boost metabolism workout, because it's 45 minutes instead of 20, so it's more of a work out, and trust me, it really is. She's way into plyometrics, which is jumping exercises-way intense. Anyway, that's all I'm going to say about working out today-today's blog is something else. I am starting my second semester of graduate school in a week, and Zane is working on his last two quarters of grad school starting this year, so we're pretty busy with life and school. We both have done quite well so far in our programs, and I'm going to tell you why I think we've done well. Zane has been going to graduate school online full time in addition to his full time job for the last year and a half or so, and has maintained a 4.0 the whole time. Some people may thing that online classes are easier than traditional classes, and I'll tell you why that is a misconception. An online class takes at least twice as much dedication: in a traditional classroom, you listen to lectures, and discuss verbally issues, and in an online class, you read the lecture notes, and write your discussion postings-it takes twice as long to read versus listen, and to write versus speak. So just getting the actual class lecture out of the way for a 2 hour course may take 2-3 hours of work at home. And then factor in homework and papers and readings, and you've got 12-15 hours a week for each online class that you need to dedicate in order to be successful. Here's the secret to being successful: time management. Zane and I each have a day planner, and at the beginning of the semester, as soon as we get our syllabi, we sit down and write each due date for large projects, small projects, and weekly assignments into our planners, so looking at each week, you can see exactly what needs to be done. Next, comes the weekly schedule. Here's a little trick I learned in college: when your schedule looks crazy, you break it down into 15 minute time slots for each day-for example, a busy day for me may look like this:
7:15-7:30-wake up/get Layla dressed
7:30-8:00-breakfast/check emails
8:00-8:15-make bed
on through the busy day crap
6:15-7:15-read chapter 6
7:15-8:15-research for paper
8:15-9:15-respond to questions for chapter 6
9:15-10:15-research for paper
end day

When you manage time wisely, the course load isn't as overwhelming, and it doesn't get away from you. That means you're in control, and I think that's 90% of the work. So to all of you in school, I say that as soon as you get all of your syllabi, put everything in a day planner, outline each day's work at the beginning of each week, and stick to it.

day 5

2009-12-20T18:33:00.000-08:00

Sorry guys for not posting recently. Let's just say that my arms hurt so much, it even hurts to type. But it's that good kind of hurt. So I worked out 5 times this week, which makes me very proud of myself! I remember the semester I was training to run a marathon, one day I was walking across campus with a friend, and like 3 guys said hi to me, which was really unusual, since guys usually say hi to the girl I'm walking with. (Case in point, the time I was with Maggie, and Nelson spend like 10 minutes telling her how amazing she was, and then said "I like your eye shadow, Heidy"...sigh). Anyway, so I said to my friend "why are guys talking to me?", and she pointed out that the constant running was having a very good effect on my physical appearance. That was nice. I have been working on changing my eating and workout habits for a few months now, and it has been slow going; however, in the past three weeks, several people have told me that I look good, which again, is such an anomaly, since I never look good. So it feels good to know that changes are taking place. I have felt so uncomfortable in my own skin for pretty much all of my adult life, though more so in the past two years than ever before. It doesn't help that that one guy in my ward working on his masters in phys ed called me up to find out my bmi to see if I qualified for a study he was doing, and said "oh...you're too skinny"...leaving me to think that he had called me because he thought I was fat enough for his study, and was disappointed to find that I wasn't as fat as he thought I was. So anyway, it's nice to know that my hard work is starting to pay off a little bit, and I've even felt attractive a few times lately-again a rarity. Okay, well-I think my arms are going to fall off.

day 4

2009-12-17T19:18:00.000-08:00

I think it's day 4. Anyhow. I've upped it to level 2. And I may be regretting it. Let's just say that the last 6 minutes are brutal, and only someone on crystal meth could survive it without wanting to die. There's a lot of plank work on level two. Do you know what plank work is? It's when you get into push up position, and do crazy things, like jumping jacks in that position, or, oh, I don't know, weird oblique sit up workouts in the plank position. I wouldn't mind it so much, except that it really gets Mr. Jigglesworth going. That, of course, is what I call my jiggly tummy, which stays hidden most of the time, unless I'm in plank position, in which case, gravity wins. And gravity, of course, makes me hate myself. Oh well. Other than that, I'm really enjoying the work out thus far. And I may be a little optimistic, but I can feel it working-at least I can feel my muscles hurting. It'd probably work better if I didn't spend the day time eating Christmas cookies. If only I didn't have so many friends who keep bringing them to my house! Oh if only I weren't so popular and well liked amongst my peers!! Okay, well-I really stink, and today has been a pretty crap tastic day, so I'm going to go take my shower, watch an episode of Brothers and Sisters, because I'm a big sap, and go to sleep.

Day 2

2009-12-14T18:57:00.001-08:00

Whew-go me. So for those of you who don't know what the 30 day shred is, let me explain it a little bit for you. It's a work out video by Jillian Michaels, the mean personal trainer lady from the Biggest Loser-only she's really not that mean. I thought I'd need someone yelling at me and telling me what a whale I am to get me going, but she's not that bad. Anyway, the way the workout goes is that it's 4 circuits of 3 minutes of strength, 2 minutes of cardio and 1 minute of abs, then repeat with different exercises. It's really pretty intense. There are 3 levels (obviously I'm doing the first level for now). I researched the workout quite a bit before buying into it, and so far, it seems to get really great results. We'll see. I opted out of showing you all pictures of me, my self esteem isn't that high yet. Just believe me at the end if I say it works!
So I've done the work out for two days now. I like it because it's pretty old school stuff; jumping jacks, jump roping, butt kicking, hand weights. It reminds me of high school gym class, and let's be honest, that was probably my fittest time in life, minus that one semester I trained for and ran a marathon-no really, I did. Seriously-I've got the bum knee to prove it. So, back to the work out. My legs feel like jello, and there are muscles in my tummy I'm feeling for the first time since I got knocked up-I'm sorry, was that crass? Oh well, it's true. So, thus far-it's good. Now I need to go shower.

the 30 Day Shred Day One

2009-12-13T15:18:00.001-08:00

Okay, well I'm admitting to two things in this post. First, I opened my present from my mom way early-there, I admit it. And second, I'm still not happy with my body. Okay, so the last time I was happy with my body was probably when I was 18 months old and didn't realize that my body had meat on it. Oh well. Anyhow, obviously, I got some workout DVDs for Christmas (don't worry, I asked for them, it wasn't some covert insult from Mom-she just tells me straight up if I'm looking chunky, anyhow). So I'm going to do the 30 day shred. And I figure in order to make myself accountable, I'm going to blog it. So later tonight after Layla goes to bed, I'll do my first work out, have Zane take some before photos, and post all about it. And you can all read about it if you're interested-if not, I don't care, I'm still blogging about it, just to keep me motivated, and on target. Why, you ask, am I doing this over Christmas? Well, for a few reasons-first, I think it's wise to start an exercise program when I'm eating like a cow, just to keep me in check a little, and second, I have a month off from school, so I thought it'd be good to get into a program now, while it's easier time-wise, and then when school starts, I'll already have this working out thing set as a priority. I'm warning you now that this blogging about working out and trying to like my body might reveal some of my emotional baggage. So again, if you're not interested in that, then don't read it. that's cool. Wish me luck!

Would You Rather...?

2009-06-29T09:14:00.000-07:00

In college, we used to play a game called "Would You Rather...?". Basically, we would pose questions to each other, like this: would you rather have a nose that constantly bled, or pee nonstop all the time? Pretty easy game to play. This blog is dedicated to Maggie and Steve, with whom we always played this game, always striving for the morally vague "would you rather kill your mom or your best friend?". What a great way to spend your friday nights. Well, the last few days, I've been thinking about this game. Because it's not so much theory anymore, as it is a horrible reality. For example:
Would you rather
-take a 13 month old to Church for 3 hours, or have a stranger punch you in the face every morning for a week?
-give a 13 month old a bath and get her ready for bed, or hold a hand grenade in one hand while being tickled constantly?
-cook dinner every night for the Rest of Your Life, or have your toe nails removed one at a time?

See, when I was in college, these were easy ones, I mean, really, how hard could it be to take a kid to church, right? Oh, my friends. Every Sunday morning, as Zane and I get in the car (always 15 minutes after church has started, mind you-and we've got a good 25 minute drive to get there), we are still optimistic. And then I get to church. And wish someone would punch me in the face. Because, seriously, could that be any worse?!

So if you see me any time during the week, and I look just a little less than my best-don't judge me. Just, please, punch my daylights out. At least that way, I'll get a little bit of sleep.

and time marches on

2009-06-03T11:57:00.001-07:00

It's hard to imagine that an entire year has passed since Layla was born. I don't remember much from those first few days-I was pretty doped up on some weird drugs. JJ likes to tell the story of how while in recovery, I called him and told him I felt like a mermaid. My sister in law saved the voice mail I left her-for a year so far. But I will always remember the moment a nurse came in to give us, finally, and update on Layla's condition. At the time, they thought she had a hole in her heart. I felt like I was underwater, trying to swim to the surface to get to Zane, to breath, to fix whatever was wrong. Stupid nurse. Thankfully, there was no hole-or at least, after my family fasted, her name was put on temple's prayer roll, and we all started praying extra hard, by the time it was all examined in whole, Layla only has a mild heart murmer. I think sometimes I forget about what a miracle that is. When I'm chasing her around all day saying "what did you just put in your mouth?!" for the one millionth time, I forget how lucky I am to be chasing her around. Layla had a week of celebration for her 1st birthday-we started out at Rene and Larry's, where Layla was dressed like a princess, complete with crown. This picture doesn't do it justice, believe me! She had on an adorable little tutu, as well. Just too cute!
So the next day, we headed off to Utah to visit my family. After a nice Memorial Day picnic and reunion with Doug and Jo and Jason and Jackie (congrats again!!), the family headed to Heber City to spend a week up in the mountains. And Layla rang in her first real year hearty mountaineer style. Or Barger style, at least. Shiney and I made her a puppy dog cake, Layla opened lots of cute presents, got frosting on her fingers, didn't eat the cake, and was trampled by her cousin Andy. It was great. So Happy Birthday to the cutest darn kid in the entire stinkin world-love her to death!!!

!

How 'bout I punch you in the face?

2009-05-21T13:40:00.001-07:00

And why not start with a picture of me in my wedding dress sitting on the can?! Exactly! Well, this week has, of course, been both mundane and crazy. Weird how that works. We used to always joke about the SVU time warp, where days seemed to drag on forever, but the weeks some how just flew past. It's not just the SVU time warp-it's the time warp of life. Everything just flies by, though the moment to moment time seems like they've added an extra 60 seconds to each minute. It could just seem that way because I spend the majority of those minutes putting books back on the shelf, and taking foreign objects out of Layla's mouth. And remember when I decided to blog and make taco meat at the same time, and then forgot I was making taco meat until the house started smelling weird. I sure do. Our quote for today is this one:
"As if you could kill time without injuring eternity". Henry David Thoreau. Why would we want to kill time? Why not use it, or enjoy it? Why are we always killing it, waiting for the next best moment to come along? Eternity is the ever present now, and if we're always trying to kill that time, hoping the next minute is a better sixty seconds than the last, aren't we really just saying that our Eternity isn't good enough? And now, I'm off to spend 60 seconds making Layla a bottle-it's not a sucky sixty seconds-right now, she's my Eternity.

Let us begin

2009-05-18T10:08:00.000-07:00

This is my real blog. I've had a hidden pretend one in the past. But this is for real. And because it is real, it is guaranteed to be boring, and sometimes self indulgent. So there. Mainly it will be pictures of Layla (because she's a lot cuter than me), quotes that I like, and me pontificating on different subjects.

We begin with a picture of Layla-because really, she's adorable. Though maybe not as adorable in this picture as she is in real life, mainly because this is about 2 hours after we discovered her egg allergy. So she's got hives all over her face and body. Because I suck as a mother. Thankfully, as a species we have the ability to adapt for survival. Or Layla would be toast, considering my mothering abilities.

On to my quote for the day: My idea of feminism is self-determination, and it's very open-ended: every woman has the right to become herself, and do whatever she needs to do. Oh, Ani Difranco, how I do love the things you have to say.

I thought I was exploring my right to become myself, when things got thrown a bit of a curve ball. I didn't plan to get pregnant right off the bat-I was trying to prevent that from happening. It was my worst nightmare. And it came true. Only, really, Layla is that "whatever" that I needed to help me become myself. I wasn't fully or entirely me, or the me that encompasses the full female experience until Layla showed up at our doorstep. I remember one day during my pregnancy, I was pretty much hating everything about it-and started griping about everything I was giving up, when a wise friend of mine said "grad school will always be there. those buildings have deep foundations and the minds that preside there usually get hired for life. so you're safe. i'm seeing layla as the factor that you weren't counting on who will guide you to where you want to end up more soundly than you could alone." And how right you are, Hannah-how right you are!